I am definitely one of those people who read the reviews before I purchase something. I love to scroll through and read the good, the bad, the crazy and the in between.

One of the things that often shocks me is how the same product can have such polar opposite reviews. I understand that sometimes a faulty product could arrive or someone hasn’t used it properly but 9 times out of 10 I reckon the reason we see such varied responses is because each reviewer had different expectations about what they were purchasing. Varied expectations will produce varied reviews!

My brother in law used to use this example to illustrate this point. I want you to imagine you are going out to eat with a friend and you decide to choose a fast food restaurant for your location.

What are your expectations of that eating experience?

You’re pretty sure that you will have to queue up to get that order, you know that it will be served on a plastic tray in a paper bag, you’ll have to eat it with your hands, it’ll be warm but probably not hot, it’s not going to the best quality, the restaurant itself is likely to be noisy and busy but it’ll be quick and cheap. Now, if someone asks you how your experience was you won’t complain about the presentation, the temperature or the plastic tray because that was your expectation. You will most likely give the restaurant a 5 out of 5.

Now, let’s imagine you had never been to a fast food restaurant. Let’s imagine your only experience of eating out was in a top dining establishment where you are seated at the door, someone stores your coat and offers you a drink while you peruse the menu. The environment is relaxing, the dinner is prepared from scratch with the finest ingredients and takes time to cook. You are used to paying a pretty penny for the experience. What do you think you’re review of that fast food restaurant would be? A big fat 0.

Both scenarios focus on the same place and received the same service but one delivered a 5 out of 5 rating and the other a 0 out of 5.

Which review is correct?

Well, both!

Our expectations form such a key part of how we experience and interact with the world around us. When we apply this to church we see the same dynamics at play. If my expectation when I attend the church is that the pastor will say hello every week and it doesn’t happen then it’s a terrible church. If I never expected the pastor to even know my name then I’m not one bit bothered when that doesn’t happen.

I guess what I am saying is let’s understand what our expectations are. Instead of us straight away passing comment on whether something is good, not good or terrible, let’s first check whether our expectation is colouring our experience. And leaders when you look at reviews or read comments let’s remember that everyone is coming with different expectations and their view is based on that. It doesn’t mean that we ignore it, we must simply be aware of it.